Trail to tide pools at Devil's Churn.

Trail to tide pools at Devil's Churn.

I love Yachats. Spring breaks in elementary school were spent at the Yachats Inn back when it was still a motel, swimming in the heated in-door pool, hiking around Cape Perpetua, and watching the sunset over the rocky coastline. Later, cute, hippie cafes and shops were established, beckoning our family to linger in Yachats for coffee and astrology readings.

When I planned my March coast trip (which started with an unexpected stopover at Spirit Mountain Casino), I was bound and determined to get back to the sweet hamlet of my childhood. Unfortunately, by the time I got to Yachats the sun was already setting, and I realized I had no clue where to eat dinner as an adult. Mainly, I was incredibly bummed that my beautifully appointed hotel housed a full serivce spa but offered no food whatsoever. My dream of sinking into my bed to watch the sun drop into the ocean while someone quietly brought me room service (I imagined it would be a sauteed white fish with rice) was not going to materialize. And, so I began my ritual hunt.

View from room at Overlook Lodge at Sunset

View from room at Overleaf Lodge at Sunset

Yachats is primarily situated lengthwise along 101 with the center of town criss-crossed by sharp angled streets hitting the highway. Almost as soon as  you realize you are in the center of town, you are already hitting the deep curve that takes you across the river and out of town. All this makes for very difficult dinner cruising. Especially if you have low blood sugar and just finished conducting a seven hour compliance visit. However, after a number of death-defying u-turns, I scored a parking place in front of the Drift Inn and crossed my fingers.

The ambiance invites you to share dessert with friends of all generations. The singer-songwriter on stage looks like a family friend, the one who got up early when you were camping to start the stove and get everyone coffee. The patrons glow with wholesomeness.

Mermaids of the Drift Inn: Coven of Empowered Sea Vixens or Nautical Brothel?

Mermaids of the Drift Inn: Coven of Empowered Sea Vixens or Nautical Brothel?

And, there is a voluptuous mermaid and her coven of wise merwomen reprinted everywhere imaginable: on the wall, on tags for the homemade sauces, on the menu. She seems to have just emerged from the tide pools to find her mermaid daughter being lovingly groomed by the Grand Crone Mermaid. This scene is undoubtedly supposed to say something empowering about the feminine power of the ocean or somesuch, but I could’t help thinking the scene came across a little more like a nautical brothel moment featuring a grey-haired, half-fish madam. I chided myself for entertaining such un-wholesome thoughts, and turned to the menu.

While I had been dreaming of gently sauteed or grilled fish, price dictated something fried. I opted for oysters. They come with grilled polenta and vegetables, which sounded reasonably healthy. While I waited for the plate to arrive, I watched the woman in the booth in front of me enthusiastically cheer on the songster. She appeared to know all his songs without appearing to be his friend. I found this curious in such a small town. The songs themselves pondered father-son relations, husband-wife relations, other family members and other family members relations and there were some musings about the forest and nuclear fall-out in there too.

Fried Oysters, Grilled Polenta and Vegetables at the Drift In

Fried Oysters, Grilled Polenta and Vegetables at the Drift Inn

After a song or two, the oysters with polenta and vegetables arrived. Visually, it was not the most impressive. Everything was soggy and seemed to be melting into each other. But the oysters were passable, and I enjoyed the polenta more than I expected. It has a satisfying texture, which made me feel like, yes, I am EATING. However,  the real treat was the lemon custard pie I took back to the hotel room to enjoy to the sound of the ocean. The weight of the slice was impressive, the crust thick and flakey, the lemon custard powerful and dense.

Overall, the service was very pleasant and prompt. The food was decent but nothing to scream about. But, I did like the feeling of being transported back to the warm, safe place I remembered from childhood. A place where everyone seems to care for their brother, sister, mother, father, friend, grandmother mermaid, forest, nuclear waste site. And, that was nice. I just wish I was as innocent as I had been at that time too.

Close-up of Mermaids: See that one on the right looks awfully saucey

Close-up of Mermaids: See that one on the right looks awfully saucy

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A review from the archive:

Jen unhappily stuck in snow at Spirit Mountain

Jen unhappily stuck in snow at Spirit Mountain

I have never stepped foot into a casino. Twenty-eight years on this planet, and I have never done Vegas or any of the local casinos that dot the reservations of Oregon. Until an ice-packed Highway 18 brought my journey to Lincoln City from Portland to a dead halt in front of Spirit Mountain Casino at 8:30 AM. After an hour hunkering in my rented Prius in the parking lot, I finally ventured over the snow-covered space to the front doors.

My first surprise was that the smoking ban in Oregon doesn’t apply to the reservations. The main gaming floor still reeks with a smell I had happily and quickly forgotten. Thankfully the non-smoking areas are fairly well identified, so I was able to make my way over to the venerable Cedar Plank Buffet. So far as I can tell, I am the only individual under the age of 50 in the entire place. Did I mention it is now 9:30 AM on a Monday morning? A snowy Monday morning in March?

Coyote customers browse Cedar Plank Buffet menu

Coyote customers browse Cedar Plank Buffet menu

I do not have a Coyote Card. I am not even sure I know what a Coyote Card is. Is it a Casino brand credit card? A pre-paid card (although that probably wouldn’t be a good business plan for a casino)? Whatever it is, the Coyote Card is the most popular form of payment to enter the pantheon of casino eating, the most notable of which is the Cedar Plank Buffet.

After several minutes of darting about the maze-like buffet, which beckons you in with signs “to start anywhere!” I finally settled on a biscuit with thick gravy then tore into another line for a slice of bacon, picked up some industrial looking scrambled eggs and then discovered they serve fry bread with honey-butter in its own little corner of the American station. 

Fry bread, eggs, biscuit n gravy and a solitary slice of bacon

Fry bread, eggs, biscuit n gravy and a solitary slice of bacon

It’s a buffet at a casino. There were certain expectations I had going into the experience. The Sysco eggs and meat, the gravy thickened to a lumpy paste left my stomach feeling a bit turned. I was hoping the fry bread would redeem the meal, and it did. Part of it may be that it is hard to screw up fried dough. Drop dough in a vat of oil and miracles happen (sometimes donuts, sometimes beignets, sometimes fry bread). But it really was the honey and melted butter that made it.

So far as I know, Sysco does not do fry bread much less honey and melted butter sauce. And if they do, please be so kind as to not inform me. Because it was perfection.

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